School won't allow my child 4 days off

We are leaving for Canada in one week, which means my son will miss 4 days of school. I wrote a note telling this to the teacher and said if there is any work that he will miss to send it home and it will be completed before we leave.
In Germany do they really work up until the last day? I know when I was in school (very many years ago) the last week was just fun and games.
The school called a friend of ours, who speaks German and is listed as an emergency contact and told him this was unexceptable. I wasn't to pleased that she didn't call me considering she speaks english and he is my son but regardless, why is it unexceptable. We had parent teacher night about 6 weeks ago and our boy is doing wonderful. He missed 5 days in March while we were in Canada but we hired a tutor for him and he worked during his whole break.
anyway, I have an appointment with the director at 11:30, I am not sure what to say to her as it was really the only time to get a flight without having to pay huge money. When^our plans were made, we lived in CH and our son was on school break, same with our last trip to Canada. It isn't as though we really want to pull him out of classes...
what to do?

one more thing, as for completing the required hours, he started school in Switzerland the 2nd week of August and has been going since.

Ouch - it is sooo against the law to take your kid out of school here ! (Part of the reason the "Ferien" are so expensive). A trip home is not an acceptable excuse for most schools, even though the flights are cheaper. Be very carefull about how you approach this, you could easily get fined for removing him from school. Normally you have to fill out a form applying for an exceptional time off school and they have to approve it.

Hint - I got mine out three days early over Pfingsten, but because my grandmother had died and I needed to get back and take care of some inheritence issues.

Thought about taking him out, telling the German school we will be enrolling him in Canada in the fall, re enroll him in Germany whên the school year starts here.
how much of a fine are we talking about??

Correct. It is a legal obligation that your children attend school and for you, as a parent or guardian to ensure his attendance. Very few exceptions are made, especially for something as trivial as a holiday. This is usually given as an example in the list of excuses that will not be accepted under any circumstances. It does depend, however, on the school director although their hands are often "tied" by the monitoring authorities.

If you apply for leave of absence and are rejected, and your child subsequently mysteriously appears "ill" on those days you will come under gravest suspicion...

And all rightly so, in my mind. School is for schooling...

YL6

They may want to see evidence of enrollment. Fines are high...

so my hands are basically tied ?
even if it is the last four days?
do they work to the end?

it is no problem to enroll him in Canada as we will still be there when their year starts.

They are probably not evenworking now - ask them. That's the certain irony. Like I said, it depends on the school director. Some are sympathetic to international needs, others just the opposite. Maybe check with other parents as to his general disposition before contacting him, or talk to the class teacher. Some of them can propose "suggestions" to work around the system...

They do work to the end - my school is then giving a concert where almost all the kdis are participating.

The only fine info I could find was "In einigen Bundesländern sind Haftstrafen bis zu sechs Monaten oder Geldstrafen bis zu 180 Tagessätzen möglich..." (In some states sentences of up to 6 months or a fine up to 180 daily rates (not sure what that is ) are possible).

it looks like I will be enrolling him in Canada the day before we leave! I just hate to make so much paper work for the school system, but on the other hand I am not into paying a hefty fine either!!!

If you know how fanatic the locals are about hitting the roads with the holiday juggernauts as soon as the holidays start (wait until you see the start of vacation traffic jams) then you'll understand why the schools rarely make an exception.

"Tagesätze" is a fine based on your average earnings. The judge decides a suitable daily fine calculated as a % of your current earnings.

the school director was the one that called and told us it was unexceptable
our tickets are non-refundable and are plans are basically set in stone...shit!!!

Tell him you have to leave early for a legal situation in Canada... that you didn't know you needed to apply to get time off, it is a one off, that you are leaving as late as possible, but have to be there before such and such a date (I had an inheritance to deal with, for example). Grovel and show how cooperative you really are :-) Worked for me...

thanks DDBug. My grandmother actually did pass away quite recently so maybe I will use your excuse.

A "Tagessatz" is a complicated calculation based on your daily (residual) earnings established by the judge on evidence of your income and outgoings. It can vary between 1 and 5000 Euros, so up to 180 "Tagessätze" can be up to half a years net earnings...

YL6

ok - but don't call it an "excuse" Lay it on really thick that you know how important the school is, etc. The necessity of all this ego stroking was reinforced while watching the principal last night (sigh).

I can see why they think it is unaccpetable. My mother in law is a primary teacher and always thinks it is important the kids are there until the end. I actually find it quite sad when you are at the airport during term time and there are people there with their kids. Nothing is as important as your child's education and development. Obviously each child is different and some could easily catch up or even have finished the work before they leave but the schools need to be consistent to protect the kids whose parents perhaps don;t see the importance of school. Maybe you could explain that you didnt know about this and that you promise never to do it again, and to make sure homework goes on holiday too??

Don't forget - you already approached the school, so they may be looking for a return approach with a new excuse and will want evidence. An exhumation and re-interment to provide the necessary proof could be equally expensive

my husband also thinks we should throw in that he is having a hard time adjusting and we are sending him to see a shrink in Canada. which we are thinking of actually doing

ohh - and the shrink only has appointments before such and such a date and you need at least three sessions...

But I would only pick one reason and make it really really good.

well we are friends with the shrink and can get documentation for this easily so I guess I will go this route.

Purely playing a role of "Devils Advocate" here, I'd question why your husband needed to go to Canada to see a shrink, and why the kids had to go back with him to meet the appointment...

I think it is the kid she is referring to - linguistic and cultural issues might be the reason they are having a canadian doc look at him.

yeah the shrink would be for our child, since we don't speak much German and would need to interact with the shrink is why we would need to go to Canada

and he has, perhaps, treated the child before an knows his "case history" ??

thanks everyone!!!
going to get ready,
husband thinks if I shed tears it will help as well.

Saying your kid is off to see a shrink will only ear mark him as a potential problem child. i.e. if they are involved in a group where somene does something bad they may accuse him of being the ring leader due to his "clear emotional issues" If you highlight this the teachers will all get to know and this could blind their judgement in the future. be careful. Why point put that your kid has issues? Unless the school can help, which I doubt, then it won't do any good.

No CRYING!! You don't want to appear out of control, plus Germans are resistant to tears.

Find a friendly doctor and let the poor kid "allegedly contract" chicken pox or such like, 2 or 3 days prior...

I would have gone the sick route ... something to know for the future.

Ergg what a nightmare!! Good luck with your meeting! Perhaps if German School System wasn't so strict & rigid, maybe they'd score better on the PISA test!!

psst - Bavaria actually did quite well on the last Pisa test ...

This is beautiful. Lies and deception on a public internet forum. Wouldn't this jolly jape be more likely to work if it weren't being broadcast to every Hans & Heinrich with an internet connection.

You have already made the error of telling the school you are leaving early for a vacation home. They now know what the real excuse is, and that anything that you do will only aggravate the situation. Don't stigmatise your child, just to save money..it isn't fair to the child. I would do what was previously written and set up a meeting with the director, explain that you did not know, stroke his ego and hope that he makes an exception. I would also write a letter to the airline concerning this problem and try cancelling the ticket or changing the date. Eventhough the tickets are non-refundable, they usually are lenient.

That being said, working at a University, I am in a position to see how students abuse the physicians' letters. There is even a "student's" physician in Freising that will write an excuse months later for an exam that they missed earlier. Eventhough the Professors know that the excuse is bogus, they can not do anything about it as it is considered a legal excuse for exemption. If you know a physician in Germany who will write the letter for you that he has stomach pains, they will know that you are lying, but they will not be able to do anything about it.

It all depends on how important education is to you concerning your child, both academic and moral.

keydeck and brokenm have fair points.
However I think (my impression is) that HW 1 ) didn't realize that kids do seriously work up to the last day of school. It is simply somewhat different in north america. and 2) she obviously didn't know how the obligation to attend school is enforced. since, in north america, even though the kids are obligated to go to school, it is common to ask for the homework ahead of time and take the kids out early.

Course - it is extremely difficult to do home schooling here as well. It is not unheard of, but a leads to a lengthy legal procedure or two.

slight side track

While I agree that "Nothing is as important as your child's education and development." this is not only restricted to the School Institution -

That is bang on correct. And as you will know that is the way it is officially seen in Australia.

on a related but totally unimportant note: it always amuses me a tiny bit to see the difference in meaning between 'pissed' in Brit English and North American English (yes I'm a bit sad like that) - actually I thought 'swearing' was only allowed in Misc titles actually

?'

While I agree that "Nothing is as important as your child's education and development." this is not only restricted to the School Institution -

can you explain this further? i also had to take my son out of school one day earlier at christmas, otherwise we couldnt have gone back to england (school endes at 13:00 on the day before christmas eve and the last ferry from rotterdam was at 20:oo the same day). we explained this with our teacher, and she understood. but i was realy worried about it, everybody (zee germans) giving me nightmare stories and advising me to pull a sickie for oscar. i deceided honesty was best, and it worked. hope it works out for you HW.

approaching the teacher first is always a good bet anyway - they know the kid and how he is doing. If I would have explained the situation to the teacher first , she would have not even marked my son absent (but since we were flying internationally, I wanted the school approval papers with me)

I assume it means that other things are important for cultural development - such as visiting your homeland, various experiences etc.

I wrote a note to my son's school just stating that we would be flying to Canada with no reason attatched

Boomtown Rat you assume correctly. A child's development and education is not the sole responsibility of the school, parents (for instance!) have a say too. And a kid can learn more from a week visiting the homeland than a week in school.

HW i think your just going to have to admit a big "fuck up" on your side, and explain that in canad it is not so much a problem. all part of the cultural learning process. wear knee pads. maybe offer in return that you'll go in and tell the kiddies all about canada... or some other way of paying their kindness back.

Propose that you kid prepare something from his trip in canada that he would present next year. That would turn your holiday into an educational trip. He may learn more that way than staying in school for the last 4 days.

Education should not only be staying put in a school class. The director should appreciate such possibilities for the kids. I hope that the director knows he is responsible of a school and not of a jail.

that is a good idea about the project, he would love it as well. he loves to tell anyone who will listen the benefits of Canada! All of our friends thought it was really weird that us of all people would move from Canada considering besides Christmas, Canada Day is my son's fav. holiday!

This is reason 281 of why I don't want my kids in school in Germany. My parents pulled my sister and I out of school several times for holidays. Our marks never suffered as a result and we got a lot more awareness of the world because of it.

@showem
how old are your kids? are you going to move back to your home country when they have to start school?
any one know by chance if the international school has the same rules?

Hah! My kids are theoretical at the moment. But it's something I've thought lots about. Don't know where we will go when we have them, either Canada or Australia probably.