One-night stands and German girls

I go out a lot and every time I do, I get phone numbers and full-on make outs (with genital groping and all) with very attractive German girls. I also get laid way more than I did in the U.S.

But with about 30% of the girls, after 30 min. of heavy petting and french-kissing in a nightclub for example, they'll just smile and walk away. Like they had their fill and they're moving on.

Do you guys feel that as an English-speaking foreign guy, you're seen more as a fling or one-night stand and your long-term relationship potential is diminished?

I ask because in the U.S., I would rarely get this many make-outs and one-night stands, but I was considered really good "boyfriend material." Here, it seems the opposite. Great for sex, but an iffy long-term mate due to the language barrier.

Any thoughts?

Sit back, Relax and let the good time roll...

Must be doing something wrong then. German girls are usually up for a fuck or at leats meeting up later if you warm them up right. Unless you just happen to pick the prudes, oh I mean decent wholesome girls.

Yeah because they expect you to only be here for a short time anyway. I have noticed what you are talking about, and to be honest I am guilty of it too. Back home, I automatically kept a distance from chicks I knew were only there for uni or something. Still fucked them of course just kept the emotions under control.

Of course once you have been here a few years girls will see you as a more permanent thing and be willing for something more long term.

Ask yourself this? Would you stay in germany for any of these girls you talk about? If not, then you are both basically on the same vibe. Not every relationship is supposed to be forever, only the last one / current one / next one.

Yes. You are now officially the king of trolls on Toytown.

I don't really think I'm trolling. I mean, this is actually something I've been thinking about and wanted to find out what others thought.

I think you guys are right. It's more the idea that I'm temporary here that might be affecting things. I think I need to work more on building up trust with these girls. My attitude for just wanting a short fling is probably rubbing off on them, making them want the same thing as well.

Ha so you want them to be interested in you as a long term prospect even though you are only looking at them as a short term thing?

I hope you arent using women as an ego boost. Surely it works better if you just start off having fun and seeing what develops than trying to force long term feelings in her from the start. It doesnt happen that way anyway, she needs time to get to know you.

Well I just realized the mistake I've made is that just because I can make out or full monty a girl, that doesn't mean I necessarily should at the first opportunity I get.

I think girls get buyer's remorse if you lay them or engage in heavy groping too early.

I need to prolong things more, get to know her, have her get to know me, all while keeping the fire burning at a low ebb. At least with the girls I want to have something more lasting with.

islander:

We all know by now that you get rock star treatment here in Germany.

I am really happy for you. Just enjoy it.

As I mentioned before there is a myth going around. I hear it all the time from Germans. They think people of oriental heritage, of Latin heritage, Italians, afro Americans are great in bed. Supposedly the darker people or people with this heritage are more "animalistic" and lively whereas the others are more suppressed sexually. But these are just myths or based on people's own experiences.

Btw: did not mean to offend you or anything.

may be they aren't feeling "enough" during the rubbing and groping process cuz during my days of short flings things usually ended up in orgasms and penetrations.

@roots: this is your moment to shine! I want to hear more stories from you, man.

Well I wouldn't say rock star treatment. I mean, I still get rejected by girls all the time, at the end of the day, I think it's a numbers of game.

I agree with you about Asians, Blacks, Latinos having a sexual rep in Germany and Europe in general. Every minority guy I've met who has some skills with the ladies have noticed this.

But I'm not so sure just being "darker" is it. Like there are a lot of Turkish guys around, so you would think they would have super success because they speak native German, but it's not really the case.

Ahh I just noticed the "nightclub" bit, well of course. Nightclub chicks are getting pashed and groped the whole time, so much it isnt special anymore. Considering they pash and grope multiple guys but can usually only take 1 or 2 home, then I think a 70% take home rate isnt bad at all.

If you want better odds I would do my spading in the ubahn or supermarket or at church where such encounters are rarer and more special. (its the whole idea that true love is unexpected and just pounces on you rather then being activly searched out in a place designed for such a purpose, sort of)

Yeah, the U-Bahn is really money. Every girl I approach and chat with, I've gotten phone numbers and good follow-on success with. It's more like a random encounter and I think feeds into the romantic notion of meeting your dream guy accidently during the day.

I actually don't like nightclubs as much because I lose my voice after a few hours. But it's the best place to get a high concentration of really hot girls. I've actually just screamed a few words into a girl's ear, made out with her, and just handed her my phone a few times. It's so tiring communicating in English in loud environments, for both me and the girl too.

Islander - you should be very, very careful.

First German girl I went out with married me

Watch out for rings and things!

Sin: I think I would like to marry a German girl. They seem straight-forward, direct, and nice, but I know that's a very superficial understanding I have of them and the culture here right now. German guys complain about them a lot though, but I'm not so sure it's not more than British or American guys who do the same thing.

Kza: Have you ever tried really forward lines, like when you see a girl walking in the other direction or about to jump on the U/S-bahn, and say 'I think you're really attractive. Give me your number so I can call you and get to know you better'. It's just too damn cold sometimes to stand there and make idle chit chat, or maybe you or her are in a hurry, but you have that eye-lock which conveys interest so you don't want to lose the opportunity.

Just curious if that would be too direct. I might test it out and see the responses I get.