Staring Germans, why do they do it so?

I am just getting really annoyed with the stares I get in Berlin when I'm walking around with a friend of mine.

She happens to be a blonde haired blue eyed German girl, and I could swear there are Germans muttering under their breath or gawking everytime I'm out and about with her.

If it's just the curious stare, I wouldn't mind. But I seriously get death glares from men and women, most of who seem like East Germans (but I can't really tell).

Is this just a Berlin thing?

They are not just East Germans and your probably just weird looking!

Well I'm not white. Is that enough to cause such a ruckus?

Quite normal in Berlin. No problem here in Munich, but when I went with my boyfriend through Berlin, the people starred at us like we were aliens..seems that the Berliners are not as open minded as they always claim to be.

Great. Guess I picked the wrong damn city.

I knew I should have gone to Hamburg.

no, I am white and still get stares, as I am non german looking, or dress differently!

Germans stare.

Ger used to it.

and it isn't cos you aren't white. It is just because Germans stare.

You seem to be really concerned about this issue judging by your posts in general. Germany is Germany, has its positives and negatives. Hamburg isn't that much different than Berlin. Relax! Stare back at the Germans! Learn some nasty phrases to snap at them when they are obviously staring at you. Better yet, learn about them!

Lots of us have noticed the staring.

Some of us are learning new and unique ways of scaring the staring germans.

The best so far...look them up and down, then walk away shaking your head. According to the person who passed on the idea, it works really well.

I have been living in Munich for a year, and it happens here too, everywhere. You can't but notice it. Everyone of my foreigner friends mention it as well. Its unnerving! Sometimes I get the urge to stick out my tongue, maybe I will someday!

Germans just stare. Get used to it, ignore it, or play along.

Here's an idea, learn to stare back. If they break eye contact first then give out a whoop and say, 'I win'...'In Your Face'...do a victory dance...If you do that, I would recommend a bit of churning butter movement, that always goes over well. I would probably pay to see that. I might even visit you in the jailhouse, I'm sure 80s dance movements are illegal on public transport.

Anyhoo, I just flash my teeth, it usually works. Either I get some teeth back or they look away.

I could think they're staring at me for all sorts of unpleasant reasons, and maybe in some cases thats true. But in most cases, its harmless as staring at perfect strangers..black, white, brown, mutt, is just part of the culture.

ps: i am definitely staring at all of you, right now

Nevermind. I went out again today and it was cool. The key was to basically change my body language and go "hard core aggressive New Yorker". Last night, I was all meek and kind of wary of everything. I mean I'm a tall guy to begin with, so today, I got hella aggressive and just stared back at people like I wanted to kill 'em. With military-style boots I get up to around 6'3", so I tried to exude menace and cockiness, and it actually seemed to work. They look away and don't really stare back again.

Also, it happens most in Mitte, which apparently gets a lot of tourists from East Germany.

In the studenty neighborhoods like F-rain or P-bert, it's cool. Hardly anyone notices. I guess I should have gotten a flat in F-rain instead.

The other interesting side-benefit I noticed is how many German girls flirt with me when I adopt this alpha body language. I actually felt like a hot chick at a nightclub with all these girls flirting with me. One even gave me her number out of the blue. I wish this happened in the US more often.

And somewhere in Germany, theres now a post asking why pacific islanders are so aggressive.

I stare back until they burn.

a bit different to this, I was on the Sbahn the other day, and there was two Japanese men and one woman there, and the woman looked at my shoes, which at the moment are size 14 uk size, although normally I take 13s, and she started giggling and then pointed them out to the two guys who also started laughing and even pointing at them, and then they started comparing their shoes with each other and I am thinking wtf??

ps I am about 6'4 so I don't think they are that excessive

Speaking of shoes, I really dig these stormtrooper boots that the cops had on today because of the nazi demonstration. They're bad-ass. I think I'm going to go ask one where I can buy a pair. I also told my mom I was near a nazi demonstration as a mother's day surprise, and she almost fainted.

I realize in Berlin, it's like the law of the jungle in full effect. You gotta go mean and aggressive in demeanor to get respect, or else they stare at you up and down and kind of scoff at you.

I'm already starting to feel like some kind of jungle ape having to stake out his rank in the tribal pecking order. Pretty soon I'll be snorting and grunting and trying to ram heads with people, and thumping my chest like Tarzan.

@islander

Just like almost everything else in the world, you can prob. find'em on Ebay

I often go out in one blue and one red shoe...

Some of the folks almost break their necks, watching and staring..

It cracks me up...

This is a joke, right? You are starting to feel like 'some kind of jungle ape'? The law of the jungle is in full effect? Sorry, is this Berlin you are talking about, as in Berlin Germany?

I think you need to just relax and enjoy yourself, Berlin is surely one of the coolest cities in the world, if the people are staring at you and your friend, take it as a compliment - I can't see the law of the jungle doing anyone any good there. Then again, if you are hanging out at Nazi demonstrations and you are a non-white... I see your point.

Hey! That's MY technique too, and I'm being serious, that's exactly how I walk down the street. I dunno why I do it, but, you know, big crowd of shoppers... I pass through them with an invisible double-axe, chopping them down as I go (mentally). I think it must be a London, or big fast city thing. No time to stop, get outta my fuckin' way.

I'm sure it's bad for my psyche

So what is your problem?

@Islander
Dude, we all know by now that you are Keanu Reeves' first cousin so enough with the description. Post a damn pic so that we have something to chew on aiite?

All man ...I am a people watcher myself..h%&l I am a photographer..well all jesting aside...I get stares all the time...everyone knows I am not from this country LOL...or maybe it is my singing of Elvis Costello songs followed by Black Uhuru!

I don't think Berlin is that "cool" for a lot of non-white guys. I saw a bunch of short Africans and Asians who were walking around with their eyes staring at the ground and looked like they were beaten down and defeated.

By adopting what I consider to be a cocky, aggressive, New Yorker attitude, I feel like I get a lot more respect and I can dominate most hostile stares with my own death glare. For example, there were two Russian/Slavic looking guys who stared at me when I walked in with a German chick I met to have lunch. I basically strutted in, gave them a look like I was about pull out a butcher knife, and they looked away and didn't make eye contact with me again. But yeah, maybe 3000 nazis and left-wingers wandering the streets looking to clash has given me a skewed law of the jungle view of the place.

I also ended up having a one-night stand with a cute German blonde today, which is a side-benefit to this new attitude I think. There were at least 6-7 gorgeous girls who were also giving me the ga ga eyes in F-rain. That's definitely not the norm in the US, and no, I look nothing like Keanu Reaves.

There is no East Germany anymore.

Anyway, Mitte gets tourists from all over Germany and the world.

But glad to hear that you've started staring back, anyway.

if you don't stare or shove back, it confirms you are not a native and they take that as license to stare/shove you extra hard. they respect those that stand up to them

Goodluck with the whole staking out your rank the tribal pecking order thing. Let us know when your crowned king and maybe someone will send you some bananas.

In the meantime, sure - congratulations on getting laid by random strangers. Though becareful not to get your mean and aggressive demeanor looking ass kicked by peeps who are actually looking for trouble. The majority of peeps dont give a fcuk who you are, what your doing, or what colour you are, they are just staring and critiquing cause, as its been said a million times on this thread, its what Germans do. BTW: there are plenty of non-white Germans and Japanese tourists come to think of it in Munich, they stare too.

I've just come back from Berlin and all the stares I got were due to my immense and captivating beauty. Or something.
And the police operations for the Neo-Nazi rally at Alex were run out of and co-ordinated at the Conference Centre Estrel which is where we stayed surrounded by sexy plod (unfortunately the bike cops only wear Goretex now and no leather *sigh*).

and dont forget they click, click and click

I am non-white and I get stared a lot but thats only because as you all know I am one sexy mofo and I ooze raw sexuality

Whatever.

islander, don't you think that it's a bit like I-expect-it-to-happen-so-it-happens ?
If I feel crap and think, bloody =!!%), everyone will stare at me today cos I look shite (I look fantastic, btw, but due to certain hormonal desasters I sometimes think I don't), they stare. And they stare in England just as here in Germany.
Same when feeling rrreally great - some people stare as a compliment or they're amazed to see someone obviously happy appearing in their grey world.

If it's really annoying, I just put on such smile and they are smiling back or looking away in shame
I think, you should relax. Stare back, smile back.

people aren't staring cause they think you're odd - i'm sure it's only a "i like what i see stare" and nothing more ... i get it all the time

don't lose sleep over this eh!

Maybe there's just lots of blind people in Munich.

what problem do you have with the east germans anyway?

Er, no, they don't - unless they're deliberately trying to provoke violence (try staring at people in England, and see how long you can stay out of hospital). In fact I find it almost amusing to see how it's almost the opposite extreme from Germany - people going to so much effort to avoid looking at each other that you sometimes feel as if you're invisible.

There is a difference between self confidence and walking round with a chip on your shoulder.
If you are going to pick fights I would avoid doing it with any of our ostbloc comrades.

Now...then I obviously look like I could never get dead dangerous

People can stare all they want, couldn't give a shite. The thing that gets me is that it is me who has to watch where I am walking on the footpath, I am over 6ft tall, and fairly big build, yet people will just walk right into me if I do not change direction. I once checked to see if this would actually happen, or if they would change direction at the last moment. I knocked this wee middle aged blocked almost off his feet. Unbelievable!!

@Wee Mun

I'm only five feet tall, and I'll be damned if I'll give these people the right of way. My husband and I were walking to lunch along a two-person wide path. Three people came walking side-by-side on the path (i.e. squeeze in so there's no chance of passing). My husband walked off onto the grass, but I just walked right into the guy in front of me. Fuck 'em. If we can walk single file to allow them half the sidewalk, these fuckers had better at least do the same. I'll be damned if I'm getting out of the way after I'm already compromising.

@Wee Mun & IPJ,
Timmeh's TopTip© # 6 :I found a technique for this whilst living in Dublin. i noticed that middle aged women, used to just look at the ground and walk really fast, everyone always got out of the way. I gave the technique a test out and success! It seems to be international too, I do it here if I'm in a hurry to get somewhere. I think as soon as the person(s) coming in the opp direction see your not gonna see them, they make way for you.

yes but aren't you guys also walking in the path of the opposing people walking in your path?
so they could equally complain about you not moving out of their way.
(2 man wide pathway or not)

Not when we're walking single file on half the path.

Looks like the thread evolved from staring Germans to bumping germans. We gonna see EB's scissors soon.

ARE YOU LOOKING AT ME?

Yes but only because your dressed like a ninja. Agreed on Roots and Katrina though, I just stare at em cause their oozing all that raw sexuality.. that and both have nice shiny hairy, which I covet really.

I probably should not ask JML, but I will anyway:

Nice shiny hairy what ?

Okay, I tend to write in an exaggerated manner. But I do think it's VERY important for you to be 100% self-confident and not show any meek or passive body language whatsoever in Berlin. And if confronted with stares, just stare right back until they look away.

Like I saw an American dude asking some Germans for directions in this subservient manner, like he was soooo sorry for not speaking German, head bowed, almost fidgeting nervously. It's like you're totally giving your power away from the get-go, and you can just feel that in personal dynamics.

Also, I'm now 100% convinced that I've suddenly gone from a normal looking guy in the U.S. to a very good looking guy here in Germany. I'm going to test this out heavily in the local nightclubs.

Hahaha. Hair. Just Hair. Head hair. Got too excited over that shine. Its fab really. Just had lunch with a certain TTer, spent time bitching about my own hair. Ah well. Shouldn't post on a full stomach.

islander:
No it's not just you or Berlin. Yes. Germans like to stare.
I guess it is not considered rude here. In other countries this is considered unpolite. Just enjoy it while you are here