Staring Germans, why do they do it so?

AAh! the staring!!

yeh it happens all the time in Germany. I lived in Giessen and then in lovely Muenchen, and they do it non-stop, but especially if you have bare feet!! wearing flip-flops brings out all the stares!! soooo funny.

and they may also stare at you if you are wearing anything unusual (or in other words, fashionable!!)

yep, they love those bare feet...i do so miss Germany now though...

I've just started working at a well known Aircraft Manufacturer in Hamburg...All they do is stare !!! I'm as WASP as it gets the only difference being is that I speak English without a German accent.

I too will attempt to test out my handsomeness, I have grave doubts though.

OK. Now that I think of it...
What really pees me off is the staring once something happened.
If you're on the Autobahn and there's an accident - there's a huge traffic jam.
Nonono- not on the side, where the accident is, on the other side, because everyone has to stare. One would become a self-made-millionaire, if selling popcorn or Würschtl (resp. fish&chips) there and then.
Or if the tram or S-Bahn suddenly goes slower than usual.
STARES.
Could be something wild to impress the neighbours with when chatting over the Gartenzaun or maybe Edi "dirty blond" Stoiber himself is standing on the tracks, waiting for a lift.
I dunno...that seems to be something very German, is it ?

No. That happens absolutely everwhere. There's even a term for it, rubber-necking.

Right...internationally crap habits then...

Try living in a muslim country as a white blond haired, blue eyed kid. This is nothing.

Tina

They can't make you bother them, only you can make yourself feel bothered. So what if they stare? I stare at things that fascinate me too. Fact of social behavior, rude or not.

Anyone ever been to Café Tambosi, Odeonsplatz? All the chairs outside point at the old building diagonally opposite. Instead of chairs facing each other so people can talk. The people don't talk to each other, just stare mesmerized at the buildings. Weird. So romantic ...

Staring to me is a sign that your own life is so empty you have to watch what others are doing. People who are busy don't stare and if they're bored they log on to TT!

Here it goes again, the stare, the stare.. On Wednesday I was sitting in the U6 carrying a bottle of oliveoil in a Karstadt white plastic bag with me. I sat down next to an old woman who immediately found me extremely interesting. I could see this in the reflection of the window across from me, didn't want her to notice that I was now effectively staring at her staring at me. She looked at my watch. Then down at my shoes. Then up again at my face, then the bag, then at my blouse, my arm next to her etc. etc. She really checked me out, looked utterly disapproving. She had to get out before me and gave me last stares through the glass waiting before she got out. I couldn't help but wonder what was going on in that mind of hers! I couldn't help but wonder whether German people have build-in "spot the foreigner" sensors or something. I look European and dress normally. Call-me-norm. Have no explanation for this.

I couldn't help but wonder whether German people have build-in "spot the foreigner" sensors or something...nice welcome to my world majorbummer...24/7
...
texastornado told me I look suspicious LOL

Where are the cute blondes in Germany? Most of the women I met while I was there were merely average. I see better looking women in San Francisco.

you forgot to bring up that you make 300,000 dollars a year in your reply

Wait I thought that all of the gorgeous German (blonde) women were with white guys??! At least that's what you said...so you must have seen some of them...i.e. they must exist...

Sorry for bringing an old topic alive - I noticed the excessive staring Germans indulge in within hours of arriving in Germany. Being a NZ'er I'm even more sensitive to the staring than most perhaps... in NZ if you stare at someone for longer than 2 seconds, honestly, you'll probablly have someone right in your face asking "What the **** you staring at, you got a problem?". I'm doing my best to deal with the staring here, like by learning how to stare back. Does anyone have any tips for what to do/say when someone is really excessive with their staring? I'm still seething about the rude cow and her partner who both stared right in my eyes for a full 25 minutes on a train trip to Breisach recently. Anyone experienced excessive staring here like this before?

@pinto.nz

Welcome firstly to germany.. I have been here since 94 and well I do a lot of staring myself, because of my job. Filming. I asked a german actually why, .. and they said their all just cheeky, so be cheeky back. NOTE you dont have anything silly written on your face the tomato sauce from the spargetti is wipped off and there is nothing inbetween your teeth.

It is a different culture from nz also my home, but can someone answer me why when germans cross a road they look in the other direction..? My driving ability improved through this...

kateTV

If someone really seems to be staring at me more than the usual TOGS, I usually do one of two things, depending on mood. Either stare back and then start to squint in a Clint Eastwood I'm-gonna-kill-you kind of way, a really dirty glare. That usually stops them. Or I try and give them something worth staring at. Flare my nostrils, open my eyes really wide, that sort of thing. Usually works too, but instead of having a German just stare at you blankly, without any real thought behind it; you'll have a German who thinks you are bananas.

Just quickly learn in German how to say "Take a picture it will last longer".

Sweetie, that was just the 'München once over' (yeah I made it up). Happens everywhere! And besides you were probably dressed well!

I always cross my eyes and stick my tongue in-and-out really quickly like a lizard worrying about the washing. If you blink really quickly at the same time, some of them think they're watching TV and reach up to see if they can fix the vertical hold.

Then, as Johnnyd suggests, you should politely, but with a big smile say "Mach doch ein Foto, es hält länger."

Or if you really want to make the point after saying it hand them a cheap signed photo of yourself that you produce from your pocket as you part company. I have notice the stare in Berlin but not so much in München but then I dont travel much on pubic transport here.

@Punchbear - Thanks for translation I shall memorise it like a babe's telephone nummer.

I guess I am a self-confessed starer. Love sitting in cafes and people watching. Fascinating! I am not sad and I have an interesting life, but sometimes it's nice to look at other people and take a peek in to their lives...or I can't help looking at interesting-looking people... I think it's generally a compliment, no?!

That's how my ex-gf explained it to me, it's actually a compliment of sorts. But I don't think I'll personally get over it, in my culture it's an open invitation for conflict and I'll always associate an uneasiness and discomfort with the staring.

In your culture, breathing is an open invitation for conflict.

*buggers off to the canteen*

Damn straight, if the Germans came over and tried breathing in my country, well, they'd be eating Currywurst with broken Lederhosen, let me tell you. Breathing. The cheek of them, no respect for the natives.

The worst is when you are on the Ubahn and straight in front of you there is someone staring at you the whole time. I just tend to smile and giggle and look away. They either think im flirting, there is something wrong with them or I am crazy. All interesting responses to me.

Rilana must be because you are half German (sorry if I remember incorrectly) but can you stand being excessively stared at? I can stand the stares what I cannot abide is when say you are in line in a self service restaurant and the person in front of you suddenly remembers they have forgotten something and the suddenly move backwards straight into you nearly knocking you over and reach across you as if your not even there.

Is that an order? Carrying around a special face-shaped mirror might liven things up, no? Hold it over your face so the starer stares at themselves. Great craic.

i've noticed people seem to stare a lot here. but sometimes i wonder if i'm the one who looked at them first, and then they think i'm staring at them and start staring back at me. probably not in all cases, but sometimes that might be what triggered it.

Staring Competitions

I feel exactly like you, coming from a place like London, if someone stares at you that way you know they are about to stab you or something as bad as that, so you get ready for a fight, what I do here in Berlin is stare back at them with a 'What the f*ck is wrong with you?' look and if they don't stop I actually say it at loud, in English too, that always disconcert them!

I will NEVER get over it, to me staring is disrespectful and an invitation for a fight, it pisses me off no end to have to feel that accosted and uncomfortable just because some f*cker can't look at their own belly button so I react accordingly...

I suffer that everyday when doing the school run, the problem is that sometimes is exactly the same people staring, like they don't get enough staring in one day, I could never smile at them as they don't stare in a friendly but bitchy way at me, I always swear or look VERY pissed off and that works faster!

maybe you're all a tad paranoid? hate to say it...

I am generally stared at a lot. Whether in London, Germany or wherever...people generally look away once you look at them and only stare when you are looking away. I don't mind that. Very rarely people stare in to my eyes for ages without looking away, which is the only thing which would really make me feel totally uncomfortable and start thinking about running! Just the normal.. woman checking out what I'm wearing, guy trying to see what's under that, kind of thing doesn't bother me in the slightest.

.

you must be quite easy on the eye then

I agree with Rilana, I only ever stare at people who look really interesting (read: very attractive or interesting style) because I like to admire them.

Take it as a compliment.

It might be different with you, you know you are good looking so they have a reason, no one ever stared to me in London, if a guy fancied me he would look a bit and wink or smile, here the look is more like: 'Ugh you disgusting scum!'

Don't sell yourself short, if your picture is anything to go by, I'd probably stare at you too and it certainly wouldn't be because you look like disgusting scum.

Exactly - I don't believe that anyone would look at you and think 'disgusting scum' ...impossible!

Amen to that

I agree with this, I had a guy look at me and I got firstly a fright and never recovered...he wasnt bad either but the intitial look put fear in me. Different situations bring different out-comes.

I try to just smile, but if someone gets really on my tits then I go up to them and ask if they need some ?help. My ex-boyfriend made a reference in England to me, 'why are people shy if I am looking at them?'

My daughter does the same, I wouldnt say shes staring but interested in that person no matter what culture/religion, I did get scared myself sometimes when she did this, when she had a fasination with darker coloured people or dreadlocks and to be honest more often than not would get a warm smile from the person that has gained her interest for that moment.

Food for thought..

Yes, children tend to do it a lot because I guess they have no preconceived ideas about it, for them if something is interesting they look and if they have questions they just ask, even stuff we'd never dare to. Shame it changes I think.

Awww I know you wouldn't stare in a bad way, you are sweet and I'd give you a big smile!

In my case I know they don't stare because of my attractiveness or lack of it, it has to do more with 'Oh another foreigner!'
I can distinguish between someone staring in admiration and someone trying to get the message across that I'm not welcome in their country, 90% of the time is definitely the latter.

I hate to spoil the party, but I don't think Germans stare any more than any other nationality. I always look at people and what's going on when I'm out and about and find that the majority of people here just look at the ground or out the window or something. If I do happen to see someone attractive or interesting (or both!), I have a quick look. Nothing wrong with that, is there??!! Having a glance here and there helps make journeys that tad more interesting. Staring is just a bit too creepy so I try to avoid doing that!!

If I ever had the impression someone was looking at me and thinking 'disgusting scum', I would know that the time would be about 6 am, that I would be a little worse for wear and in need of my bed, and that the person would have every right to think that!

I think a lot of people stare because they are not all use to seeing people of color so much. My current city we have a 70% minority population, Black people everywhere. No big deal. The city I am moving to next month, all I do is look for someone of another race because it isn't normal to me. Then I also know I am not the only foreigner.

I guess I must look German enough. Everyone tried to speak German to me, then realized I had no clue what they were saying as I look at my boyfriend and say "help" I didn't think reddish hair was all that popular in Germany till I saw so many people with dyed red hair.

I do must say the one thing I like about the staring in Germany is that they just stare and don't smile and say "how re you doing" "Whats up?" That is an American thing and it annoys me to no end. Personally if you are going to ask me how I am doing, or whats up at least pay attention to the answer and not keep walking and ignore me after you asked the question. I get the being friendly part but I don't get the false friendliness.

The only people I stared at in Germany were the group of Russian kids in Berlin, I guess the bad thing was that I knew they were Russian. A bunch of the ugliest kids I have ever seen. No offense to Russians...

Oh ad in the US I also get stared at and usually lewd comments...stupid men. I am hoping this doesnt carry over in Germany.

For me it's the kind of look. I think the Germans linger on you much too long when they look (stare). Now I know it's human nature to be inquisitive and curious, but the lingering stares are sometimes unsettling and uh, just rude. The women are worse than the men with this.

It's probably a national conspiracy

Little Miss Punchbear and I were on the U-Bahn once and 2 teenage Turkish kids were sitting across from us. One of them was a little bit on the porky side and LMP starts staring at them. Eventually she points at the porky one and pipes up in German "Papa, ist das seine Mama?". Heavens to betsy.

Yep, I do agree that the Women are the worst with the staring - especially old Women, they are usually the ones with a look of distain on their faces too whislt doing it. Thanks everyone for the tips on how to deal with it by the way.

you gotta love em.

My little cousin was like that all the time. You practically died inside everytime she opened her mouth...but they were valid questions.

If someone is staring at me on the U/S bahn i usually make direct eye contact with them and say hello and ask them if we have met before, usually does the trick and they turn away sharpish.

give the old woman a smile then!

Old Germans are pure evil. Fact.