The British invented sport

You're welcome

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AncientBrit
And swimming (well we are Inselaffen, after all)

Edit: Should've included kayaking, rowing & sailing for the same reason
Hazza
Modern boxing rules were mainly developed in England (Queensberry rules).

However, I think it's safe to say that people have been punching each other for sport for a lot longer than that...

EDIT: hang on, you can't just claim everything!!!
RainKing
Modern boxing rules were mainly developed in England (Queensberry rules).
However, I think it's safe to say that people have been punching each other for sport for a lot longer than that...
Clearly, people around the world weren't sitting around on their hands whistling while waiting for some toff in blighty to tell them what to do. Most of the sports mentioned in this thread had precursors in other countries. Football was played in many forms in ancient times, from China to Greece. As was boxing, darts, bowls, and hitting balls with sticks.

But it's when you talk about the modern form of the sport with its formal fules that you can say that it was invented in Britain, or the US or France etc. Under that condition, Britain can claim football or boxing, France gets cycling, the US gets basketball etc.
Farbenfabrik
Hang on ... didn't we 'invent' Australia.

Surely, Australia is our reserve squad, therefore.
Using that logic we could also claim the medals won by the US, Canada and various other former colonies
Dr. Love
As a Englishman, I'll start feeling the pride when we actually walk home with the World Cup (for the first time since bloody 1966).
*

Dude, keep on dreamin. Sorry for the bad news

*after 2 irregular goals for England you forgot to mention.
don_riina
How can one country invent so many, yet be good at so few?...
Look, we in England invented everything. There was a time when we could actually play sports, but quite honestly, we are all a bit to busy being lazy these days; our legacy was to teach others how to properly play them. If Australia and India are now good at cricket, it's down to the English inventing Australia when we needed a prison*, and inventing India when we needed somebody to grow some tea for us. Sports is our gift, we've earnt the right not to get all hot and sweaty whilst playing sports, but to sit back on our arses drinking beer, and watching our global "children" play sports on massive widescreen TVs made in Indonesia for 13p by some small child. For fucks sake, we all get to retire at some point you know.

*Only a fucking Englishman could discover a massive country with loads of awesome beaches and fantastic sunshine, and think it would make a decent prison. I mean seriously, you can imagine some bloke actually finding Oz and saying some shit like "Hmm, that golden burning globe in the sky doth create an ungodly heat. Thou. Let us return to the comfortable grey drizzle of Londinium, and use this foul place for to doth keep our prisoners. Thee". Fuckwits. Even today, if you are a teenager, and knife somebody, your punishment is to be sent on a "character building" trip to somewhere sunny. Unreal.
Owain Glyndwr
there is no such thing as an irregular goal.
eurovol
If it's any consolation, you're pretty good at darts and snooker.
And beer guzzling which pretty much makes you pretty good at anything that involves being in a pub.
lilplatinum
Were the Scotts considered 'The British' in the 15th century when they invented Golf? (Edit: Actually even further back since the 15th century was the first legal mention of it but apparently it was 'invented' in the high middle ages).
Dr. Love
there is no such thing as an irregular goal.
Yes there is.
lazybum
Were the Scotts considered 'The British' in the 15th century when they invented Golf? (Edit: Actually even further back since the 15th century was the first legal mention of it but apparently it was 'invented' in the high middle ages).
Scots are British, they're just not English...

not until they learn some table manners anyway
DanielF
is it really so clear that the Brits 'invented' all of these of just developed and organised them into the nature of sports we have today? Like people could have kicked about something resembling a football anywhere anytime. Fair enough, they developed them, but invented? Would that be a bit like saying the Greeks invented running?
don_riina
Were the Scotts considered 'The British' in the 15th century when they invented Golf?
Doesn't matter, we invented the Scots anyway, so anything they invent* also belongs to us.

people could have kicked about something resembling a football anywhere anytime
Big difference between an idiot kicking an object around aimlessly, and the graceful ballet that is football.

Would that be a bit like saying the Greeks invented running?
Again, difference being running as a sport, and running as in flapping about in a white sheet and pair of sandals, with the aim of getting into your homosexual lovers arms quicker.

*or give birth to (if it's a girl)
Owain Glyndwr
Scots are British, they're just not English...

not until they learn some table manners anyway
the English are the ones that aren't really British anyway. There were "Britons" living in Great Britain long before the Saes sailed over from Germany and Scandinavia.

I stumbled across a really old map the other day which quite nicely showed Cumbria, parts of Northumbria and southern Scotland belonging to Wales. It used to be called The Old North.
Dr. Love
*Only a fucking Englishman could discover a massive country with loads of awesome beaches and fantastic sunshine, and think it would make a decent prison. I mean seriously, you can imagine some bloke actually finding Oz and saying some shit like "Hmm, that golden burning globe in the sky doth create an ungodly heat. Thou. Let us return to the comfortable grey drizzle of Londinium, and use this foul place for to doth keep our prisoners. Thee". Fuckwits. Even today, if you are a teenager, and knife somebody, your punishment is to be sent on a "character building" trip to somewhere sunny. Unreal.
Cook wasn't the first to discover Australia. Long before him the Vikings "discovered" it. Even the Dutch ('New Holland' and 'Van Diemens land' as they named parts of Australia) and the French, Portugues and Spanish were there before him. The thing was that they all thought it is unhabital land and nothing will grow there so they never really colonized it.
The British lost the territories in North America (Independence from Britain 1776) and where looking for another dumping ground for their shall we say outlawed and riffraff to send far away from Britain.
Australia was considered the perfect place for that and hence shortly after colonized.
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