Five things I should be able to do...

1. Cook a decent meal.
2. Dress smart.
3. Undo a bra strap.
4. Stick a duvet in the cover.
5. Play a musical instrument.

change tires on a car

Blimey PlaneGirl that is nothing to be ashamed of! Changing wheels is easy but changing tyres on cars...now that is very tricky with a pair of forks and some fairy liquid.

is it because im american...but i dont know what ur on about...

1 drive
2 swim properly
3 understand blokes (think this is imposs)
4 fix a puncture on my bike (though hopefully after today I will be able to)
5 act like I really like someone who in reality I can't stand

Number 5 would prob be the most useful one, career-wise, I reckon.

There should be a school for that. I dunno how we manage to put them on in the blink of an eye and yet when men try to get them off...it just seems to be so complicated.

So mine:
1. Change tires on a car.
2. Do my taxes.
3. Make a pie (mmm pie...must remember to get pie at Ikea).
4. Use a hula hoop.
5. Rollerblade/Inline skate.

1. Used to do but now have a wife to do it for me.
2. Never used to do but now have a wife to tell me how.
3. See 1.
4. See 1.
5. Used to do but now have a 15 month old.

you said change the tyres (or "tires" in your silly american language), whereas maybe you mean actually just changing the wheel, including the alloy, ie. wheel and tyre combined?

changing just the tyre requires a machine.

p.s. i can in fact do this

Ahhh - like the old joke "Why do women get married in White?"

...

...

Well - all domestic appliances come in white don't they.

car talk..way over my head...i meant the simple one..where u use a car jack and on of those metal things...ya know what im talking about

@JE..im offended...nope not really but all my kichen appliances are in stainless steel

We call it 'changing the tires' when you have a flat and need to put the spare on.

Dunno what you Brits call it...will have another 'language discussion' about it with my husband when he gets home

yes and i explained it badly.

so that means you cant change a car wheel, never mind the actual tyre..

i think j english was just being a smart arse.


edit: ok that explains the confusion, a bit like calling it a "gas station"

there are some strange folks about...

Do you call the spare a spare tyre or a spare wheel??

It is changing the wheel in the UK

1. Any maths more advanced than matrices.
2. See the back of my head unaided.
3. Live like royalty
4. Beat my coworker at chess.
5. Think of a 5th answer to this question.

Great business idea... Teach men how to undo bra strap. WTF's so difficult about that??? (Ok, I admit this sounds like a shameless plug, but really!)

I can even do courses on different levels
Beginner (action takes more than 15 seconds, involves eyes)
Intermediate I (7 - 15 seconds, involves sly look with help of the bedroom mirror)
Intermediate II (under 1-7 seconds, may involve looking)
Advanced (0,5-1 second)
Joey Tribbiani (They never see it coming)

1. Manage my finances
2. Do my taxes (I'm with you on that, Blimeygirl)
3. Learn to control my appetite
4. Self discipline in general
5. Second deal (magic-related stuff)

Hmm with all respect this is not a language discussion but a point of accuracy. Changing tyres and changing wheels are not the same thing. But what do I know, I can't even change a tyre

Tie a tie properly
Ride a bike without being wobbly at the start and nearly riding into parked vehicles
Pronounce the similie for "truck" beginning with the letter "L" and ending in "orry"
Wear my specs without being vain and taking them off
Not flirt

No worries - I knew exactly what you meant. I was just being an arse as we say over in Blighty.

never mind as long as you can balance the wheel after you put the tyre on you're laughing

Spare tire. Now I am curious...is it still considered a 'tire rotation' in the UK when...well when they rotate the tyres (see spelled it this way against all my better judgement )

No wonder English confuses people.

Nope. Wheel rotation (whether you mean swapping the wheels about to spread the tyre wear out or the actual wheels turning, as they tend to do when the vehicle is moving

Edit: actually it could be either now I think about it, but I personally would say wheel rotation

And without popping any buttons off...well...that there is worth a nice shiny certificate I think. Zertifikat BH

you rotate your wheels to make your tyres last longer...

I cannot...

Ice Skate
Ski
Speak French

but I can open a bra with a click of the fingers

Yeah and it is a language point then since we call it 'tire rotation'. Just semantics really...all means the same thing. But gets confusing with the wheel/tire thing if you are trying to be specific.

And while carrying on a separate language discussion, I managed to come up with 5 more:

1. Light a lighter (I cannot for the life of me get that coordinated with fire).
2. Build a fire (like campfire...they never stay lit...hmmm fire theme here).
3. Do a somersault (roly poly in UK?)
4. Drive a manual car.
5. Jump in the water without plugging my nose (I used to when I was a kid but now can't seem to)

Yeah I never found a bra a problem either. In fact I can undo it in about a second...with one hand!!

maybe the bra thing depends on the size of the boobs?
cos bigger boobs tend to be housed in industrial-strength bras

apologies to post this here, but somethings been buggin me all day.

what is the other, more common word for sasquatch? not yeti, the darker one (think harry and the hendersons...)

1) Cook - really anything more than a bowl of pasta
2) Speak German(3.5 years here and still it's bad)
3) Sew
4) Play the piano(although I do play the flute quite well)
5) How to lie without blushing

Cooking and sewing was for my sisters. I did the 'boy' stuff like rotating/changing tires, change the oil, reshingle a roof, build stuff with wood, etc.

No, that makes no difference. Its all about the clip!!
I'll prove it the next time we're all out!!

And jeremy is right about the roly poly thing!I just couldnt be arsed typin it!

Nope a Somersault is a head over heels.

Roly poly is what you do lengthwise down a hill.

mightypies: bigfoot

nah - a roly poly is a somersault where I come from

I have only ever heard sasquatch, bigfoot or yeti. Now you got me curious...

He he he. Get a translation for that one at your next German lesson!

(my German is rubbish as well but some things kinda stick)

JE - don't leave me hanging - just tell me!

And I've heard all the English comebacks to 'I play the flute' so no need to hear those again!

Abominable Snowman?

Nothing like a guy fumbling around trying to get your bra off to break the hot and heavy moment with laughter.

There's not a lot I can't do that I can think of, but there's lots I can't do well:

1. Get the hang of der, die, das, den, dem, des, etc.
2. Clean house
3. Ice skate/Roller blade well
4. Play my trombone proper-like
5. Oh, which brings me to one thing I really can't do: Read bass cleff. I only know the notes as positions on the trombone, not by name.

from what i know:
Somersault is head over heels while in the air
forwards roll is the same but on the ground
rolly polly is laying down flat and rolling down a hill.

I forgot getting the barbecue going in my last post... Replace with second deal... But then again, maybe not.

you played the trombone very well on Sunday, Miss Showem

Thanks Topsy, but well... a couple of times... not every time and not even the majority of the time... but a couple of times...

I was faking it. Just like the Hausmeister. (In joke from my concert, too bad if you missed it)

no!!!
so the guy was right all along about the hausmeister thing?

Flöten - slang for BJ.

p.s. Was that a "rusty trombone" by any chance?
http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?...=rusty+trombone

hmm tricky question indeed (where I as a german seem to know the difference between changing a tire and a wheel), this one is more like:

1. Ever understand why the "hinterland" ppl voted for bush
2. Understand in general (Politics, Grouping etc)
3. Why after 2 bottels of wine I can still walk straight
4. Why I listen to X-Mas music just now ?
5. Hmm, Ohh, can you hear me thinking. *fart*

Johnny, a rusty trombone would be more difficult to fake. And would result in more protests from the "audience".

Oh, yeah, 1 more thing:
1) Burp and fart on demand - men seem to really be impressed by this.

so what's an abominable snowman, then?

http://www.occultopedia.com/a/abominable_snowman.htm

He's lovely* Topsy as well you know.
*well, sort of