Germans are smiling at me

Hello, after one year in Munich, I have moved to Holzkirchen (a little village at the end of S5). I felt the need to post as I am in the grips of a strange new phenomenon: with no solicitation whatsoever, Germans are smiling at me. WITH WARMTH AND FEELING!!! They ask after me, they're curious about me and I feel positive they CAN recognize someone is standing in front of them! (In Munich I was never sure, there were weeks when I worried maybe I had died without my realizing it, but no, here I am, object of smiles and---some sort of affection??? Can it be???)

This has however raised secondary problems: after two years of 'sophisticated' European cities, I have become a drone-like non-smiler. I react with the same blank suspicious stare that I received over and over again when I first arrived in Europe. (I started my new exciting life abroad in France, mind you, which is like starting counseling with electro-shock treatment), and I am afraid of who I have become:

A beaten-down over-dressed stressed-out zombie shell.

I remember the old me... When I first got to France, a handsome young man smiled at me, and by SMILE, I mean, with a powerful magnifying glass, you would have noticed the corners of his mouth sort of twitched up, but all the same, it was a smile, and I returned with an L.A. smile: a full-teethed "Hi!" I am not kidding you, this man JUMPED!!! JUMPED!!! As if ATTACKED!!!

It took no time at all to realize these people equate friendliness with mental instability, and there I was.

But this new evidence suggests the opposite, and my only quesion is...

Will the friendly, non-paranoid me come back?

Congratulations on moving "aufs Land"!

People out of town can be a lot friendlier than city folk, so just try to "go with the flow".
I found the people in my town were quite interested in the fact that I had left England to come HERE, and have developed some really good friendships here.

Relax and try to just be yourself again!

Good Luck!

Another smile thread.

Still don't get it. Maybe because I live out in the country as well. I spend enough time in Munich though so I don't think it can be just that.

Germans smile back ALL the time. Like almost constantly. Go to England and no fucker ever does. Making eye contact is verboten.

When I was in England three weeks ago I once again put it to the test. One person smiled. In the hotel we stayed at the last night. I was delighted to be proven wrong. Then she said hello in a thick German accent!

And Jesus. Don't even think about it in the States. Them's got guns.

There must be something in the water. I was on the S-Bahn on my way home from a TT meet-up last week when I was just staring off into space with that same non-smiling face I have grown to use. Then, someone on the Bahn gives me one of those half-smiles. I almost died of shock. It's like, when trying to turn up the muscles of my face into a smile, they went into spasm and wouldn't let me smile. I can't believe someone actually smiled. Unbelievable.

Maybe we really have been here too long...

In two years here, I've yet to witness this whole no-one-ever-smiles-back thing, but I do have to thank you, VernalFalls, for making me laugh. Bloody hell I needed it, you've made my day with that little tirade. Thanks.

I'm not buying any of that nice crap!

I know what you mean about becoming "one of them" a suspicious person reacting to every smile as if the person were a con-artist wanting to screw you out of something.

VF--You do know that teeth-baring in primates is a threat? Start slow...have an opening conversation with just a hint of a smile, and you can work into your California smile. At least, it worked for me in Koeln and around NRW. I even got four strangers to loan me their handy with my lunatic California smile. =D

VF, I think you’re reading too much into it—perhaps your fly was open.

Dan

Holzkirchen's a grand wee spot, used to live there, the locals are mostly very friendly and hearty, with the occasional grumpy Bavarian for good measure, but otherwise a nice place with lots of familys and that market town pride.

But did they smile?

Sorry, the most salient point omitted. Yes, they did indeed. In the neighbourhood I was living in, I got smiles and waves all the time and not just from the nodding neighbours. I always thought it was kind of like living in E.T.

When we first moved here, 40 years ago, it was far worse. In one village we lived in there was a narrow path, where one had to almost turn sideways to pass someone. One day I passed an elderly man in this alley and greeted him in Bavarian. I could feel his eyes burning in my back and he actually called me back. He asked me in German whether he knew me. When I said no he told me that in Germany one doesnt greet strangers!
Things have changed since then, particularly amongst youngsters. Where my husband worked the young people were all on first name terms amongst themselves and quite a few called my husband by his name as well, even though he was their boss.
Once you do make friends with Bavarians they are very friendly, it is considered something special if you are on first name terms with people. It can be amusing when they fall out, and reverse to formal speech!

This is one of my favourite hobbies in Munich: choose a target, smile at the target and say "Guten Morgen".
I like the face of the people and I like to read the subtitles: "Do I know that guy?" or "..." or "tsk...a psycho..." or "oh, how nice"...

BS. I was visiting in a medium-size uni town in N.Carolina and was constantly smiled at by people, made small-talk to, struck up niceties with the supermarket cashier who was having a bad cough day and was just being friendly with me, talking about the weather. Same thing in Boston, every person I asked directions from was giving me the Colgate face, being extra super nice and smiley. Remind me when you've been to the USA?