Seeking advice from experienced parents of little terrors. My daughter is very strong willed, wants to run the show and will never back down in an argument. These days any time I am in disagreement with my daughter, e.g. confiscate a toy she has been "abusing" (bashing, throwing) there is a big fight because she refuses to accept my line. What people describe as the Trotzphase is the only thing I have ever known with her. It is definitely not just a phase. She always had her own program rather than joining in the group, refuses to obey or cooperate and fights me from dawn (getting dressed, having breakfast) to dusk (every meal sabotaged).
Kind words and being patient do not seem to bear fruit. Often things get ugly. She bites, scratches, screams and kicks. Sometimes it ends in a smack, which seems to be the only thing she takes seriously. Now the Kindergarten leader has asked me to attend an interview - "We have to talk - your child does not take any notice of what I or anyone says..." i.e. she is out of control - and she has only been there 8 weeks.
What do other parents do when kids her age behave badly? My husband is the guy with the carrot, while I wield the stick. It is my firm belief we should not be dancing to her tune and she has to do what we say but how do we get her to do that?