Wiesnitis (Oktoberfest flu)

It happens ever time without fail. You can see it coming a mile, err, kilometer away. It's more predictable than the crowds of visitors that gather at the Rathaus in the center of town at 11 am, noon and 5 pm to watch the clock tower figures turn.

Each year, (for some one and three quarter centuries and counting), starting in mid-September and running until early October, six million or so domestic and international visitors gather together in a southern German toy-like town (some say village) of Munich to celebrate the wedding of a Bavarian prince (later king). In the process they today consume an estimated six million liters of beer (some more than others), one hundred oxen and half a million chickens and generally have a good time at the world's largest Volksfest that is the Oktoberfest. But even before the Wiesn has drawn to an end, many visitors to and residents of the event's host city have gotten it: Wiesnitis.

Derived from the Bavarian German word for the Munich Oktoberfest, Wiesn (itself derived from the German word for field or farmland, Wiese) and -itis, a suffix used in pathological terms that denote inflammation of an organ and hence, in extended senses, nouns denoting abnormal states or conditions, excesses, tendencies, obessions, etc. (source: dictionary.com), Wiesnitis (sometimes incorrectly spelled Wiesenitis) manifests itself initially as the sniffles or a sore throat but develops quickly into a full-blown cough or cold. In women, the onset may also be accompanied by headaches, nausea or even queeziness in the stomach. In general, it's a feeling of being 'under the weather' (or just plain sick) after attending the Oktoberfest. It lasts from several days to a week or more. In some cases, side effects can last a lifetime.

It's caused in many ways. From drinking beer from someone else's beer stein (or Mass) [whether accidentally or not], to kissing a perfect stranger in cute traditional costume (or Tracht) [whether intentionally or not] in what is referred to as a Wiesn tent flirt (WTF) or from catching a chill while walking, err, stumbling (regardless whether alone, in pairs or supported on both sides) sweaty and highly-inebriated through the cool autumn air across the large festival grounds from the exit of the beer tent to the door of the taxi -if one can be found after the beer tents close. Combinations of the above contributing factors are known to strongly increase the severity of an outbreak of Wiesnitis.

Wiesnitis is often wrongly self-diagnosed simply as a hangover. A hangover will come and go fairly quickly the first day after a visit (it's only beer, after all). In fact, Wiesnitis is more serious than that, affecting thousands of well-intending party-goers ever Fall season. In January 2008, the Statistisches Bundesamt Deutschland (German Federal Office of Statistics) reported a decrease in the national consumption of bier which may help to reduce the spread of Wiesnitis. However, year-on-year figures for Oktoberfest 2006 and 2007 showed more beer was consumed by fewer visitors (source: muenchen.de), a disturbing trend in combating the spread of Wiesnitis.

The disease is also referred to by its more scientific name Post-Oktoberfest Syndrome (POS). Leaving Munich, many POSers will travel on to other destinations around Europe and eventually find their way back home, spreading the disease much further afield in the process. An employer's nightmare and an epidemiologist's dream, the Centre for Disease Control in Washington is considering the classification of POS but hasn't yet determined the affect on American visitors, ex-patriots and armed forces personnel in Germany or the overall American economy (what's left of it anyway). Initial observations report that 'the POSitives outweigh the negatives' in having Americans abroad for non-military purposes.

In fact, many residents of Munich flee just prior to their town being invaded and occupied for two and a half weeks by a Coalition of the Swilling including other Germans from across a now strongly united nation (that is, from both East and West) as well as by Italian, Spanish, American, Canadian, British, Irish, Aussie, Kiwi, Japanese, Chinese and Indian parties and by just about every other nationality on the planet that can afford to travel halfway around the world to consume large amounts of alcohol for a celebration the reason of which usually remains unknown until well after arrival (and sometimes departure).

It's difficult to assign blame to one particular demographic group as being the source of Wiesnitis. Whether it's the visitors from countries across the Atlantic or south of the equator that suddenly find themselves somewhat under-dressed in the damp climate present north of the Alps or the visitors from southern Europe who are just so very keen and eager to get to know the locals intimately well all remains pure speculation.

Wiesnitis knows no cultural, social or economic bounds. Germans are equally susceptible catching to the disease as are foreigners. The financially liquid (also known as 'the rich') are as equally affected as the less well to do (also known as 'the poor'). Employers and employees having celebrated at the Oktoberfest together also suffer together. In a way, it gives hope to see often conflicting parties, German and foreigner, rich and poor, manager and peeon, etc. for once grouped together, united in their affliction.

Of course, those Munich residents who remain in town during the Oktoberfest know well of Wiesnitis but tend to deny its existence. Economic well-being is more important than physical well-being, you understand. Offices, shops, farms and factory floors on the first Monday after the Oktoberfest closes are filled with subdued suffering workers (and bosses) sneezing, coughing, perhaps even opening complaining but no one would dare to stay home and call in sick knowing full well exactly what ails them and why. The wrath of co-workers and co-conspirators is unforgiving.

Just as there's no cure for the common cold there is no known remedy for Wiesnitis. Even if one refrains from going to Oktoberfest it may strike indirectly, through a colleague or partner (certainly a cause for suspicion). Wiesnitis won't kill you (not directly, anyway) but it will leave its mark. As your doctor or grandmother would tell you, prevention is the best medicine.

This author's prescription to all sufferers of Wiesnitis: just grin and bear it and think of the good times that you had at the Oktoberfest (if you were there and can recall them). It's ok, Munich still loves you.

Getting sick from dirty Mass Krugs etc.

Oktoberfest flu

Very good, but to round it off, this topic needs a poll!

Is it possible that Wiesn just coincides with the onset of the yearly flu or flu-type bugs going around? Here in sunny So Cal., my city has got a bad stomach bug going around right now.