German women and their sex/romance preferences

Could someone tell me what type of romance German women like? Are they traditional, like love letters, flowers, sweet nothings etc. or are they more modern and shy away from that sort of treatment, seeing a man as desperate or weak by showering her with affection? I am also interested in knowing what German women think about sex. I am dating a woman who makes comments like sex is not exactly at the top of her list but she will tolerate it. We have not had sex so I haven't a clue about how she is in bed. Maybe she has just never had good sex or whatever. Are German women open enough that I could just blatantly aske her why she might not care for sex for whatever reasons? She also does not like public affection. Whe will jsut barely allow me to give her a peck in public, a french kiss would be out of the question! She will allow me to hold her hand or put my arm around her in public, but otherwise she is not affectionate at all. We have only been in public so I am not sure how she would react in private. She tells me shi is much more affectionate in the bedroom. Ideas, comments or suggestions?

ddesigns, you should probably consider whether sex is important to you. It seems to be pretty early in your relationship, and if she is telling you NOW she's not really interested in sex generally, I think you should take her at her word. Not assume that she's just not had good sex (such as, no doubt, you are confident you could provide.)

I don't think you can generalize about German women any more than you can generalize about American ones. Want to know if she likes flowers? Send her some and see if she's pleased.

Jesus, and you're still listening to anything she has to say? If sex is at all important to you, get out now.

Edit: just made the connection to your other topic thanks to Pas. I'm going to go ahead and call this one like I see it: this chick is totally using you. She's never going to play hide the salami with you and in all likelihood is not the least bit interested in you. Stop worrying about her romantic likes and dislikes and just get out.

I hear they're into scat.

I think you need to get more experience by dating college sophomores before you take this one on.

Strange: Dating a German immigrant to the U.S.

In my vast experience of one German and one American I'd say ditch the German and stay with Americans. Far superior. ;-)

First of all, just to clarify, not all German woman have the same opinion/likes/dislikes.

If the one you're dating now, isn't very affectionate with you then maybe she's either that way with everyone - or she doen't want to date you any longer and is trying to tell you something.

How much is she taking you for? Maybe you should tell her no lolly no money - she will soon defrost.

..and of course, YOU'RE the guy who could show her what good sex is aren't you!

Not true, some don't even like Jazz.

i dont think you can put german females into any kind of category just like any woman from any country, there all different , some affectionate some not, etc...etc the only thing women have in common in my experience [ i have had more than my fair share of different races] is they all love a good tonguing

Thats what they always say and then some how u end up in the basement with a whip and candle... ...no?

Her Prioritized List:

1. Find a gullible fool
2. Spend fool's money on me and my child
3. Marry the fool
4. Spend even more of the fool's money on me and my child
5. Get fool to apply for my American citizenship
6. Fuck the fool

As for affectionate in public, I see lots of couples holding hands, even older ones (which is quite cool i think),
not much kissing or anything, except for the teenagers, so not too much of a culture difference there I think.

I think we all know that trying to quantify "what women want" is a bit crazy, even in a broad a sense as culturally related.
I only know 2 things about women, and both are wrong.

One thing I think I have noticed however is though:
Me being used to Irish and English culture (where I think girls are a bit more predatorial), I think that German girls do
not show there interest as much (at initial stages)...and I'm sure even that is a sweeping statement.
Then again this can probably be put down to German people, as a whole, being a little more withdrawn from strangers.

P.s If anyone offers a rebutle to my statement, please also include where you find these women that have shown contrary
evidence to what I've said.

Do I understand that correctly, she has been abused in her previous marriage? Little wonder she is hesitant to share the bed again under these circumstances, methinks. If you love her enough to want to stay together, give her time, be gentle, be sweet, especially when it comes to "body contact"

In reply to the topics title...I think the sex/romance preferences of German girls can't be "generalized". I am one, sometimes prefer this and another day that - you wouldn't want to eat Spaghetti each and every day either, would you ;-)

German women should try and wear more perfume and act more feminine. They should take lessons from the French.

Like any other women, German women are not homogenic. Some are traditional, some not. Some are romantic, some not.
She does not like public affection. Big red flag. I think she is seeing another guy besides you.
Germans like to display their affection in public, just go downtown on a Saturday and you'll see lots of pairs making out in the street.

In Zurich maybe but not in Munich.

I am talking about Frankfurt.

I totally agree. Germans on a whole do an awful lot of PDA. Just look at that couple doing tonsil licking while waiting at the cashier in the supermarket.

You are being sarcastic, right?

Haven't you been to 'Englischer Garten'?

Don't you think that whole not homogeneous thing would also apply to whether women like PDA?

ddesigns: Your main objective seems to be to get this woman into bed and to ask people here how to achieve that despite the fact that the woman has indicated that she isn't interested in a sexual relationship. I agree with sweetsilence. But to be fair on the woman, I think you should move on.

There is a snappy abbreviation in English for something that is unknown as a word in German (maybe "öffentliche Zurschaustellung von Zuneigung" ) so I guess there are indeed some (at least minor) cultural differences.

Well I see so many German females feeling up their boyfriends in the U-Bahns and on the streets so it's almost homogenic.

Ddesigns, your only hope here is to go for the jealousy card. Just tell her delicately that you’ve met someone new that actually knows how to swallow. If she responds favorably then all well and good if not then nothing lost anyway as it wasn’t going to go anywhere. You could also show her a picture of the “new girl� with the photo, name and address of someone that has dumped you (there must be many) – just incase she becomes aggressive with it. Nothing like killing two birds with one stone.

LOL, that is so funny.
I second the advice.

Oh, yes, that's excellent advice. Then you'll know for sure that the only reason she's having sex with you is in hopes of getting US citizenship. So reassuring.

you must understand that the vagina is a negative space. It doesnt like to be invaded by strangers,like Poland when the Nazis invaded it.
Invading(penis) is fine. Everyone likes to do it,but nobody likes blitzkriegs(rape)

take it easy. Tell her youre just bringing new technology to her country(vagina)

Give up and move to another country! These are some of the world's COLDEST women! They've fought so long to be equal to men that they've forgotten what a woman is. German women act like men and Germen men act like robots. Trust me, I've lived and worked in several different countries and this one has the most closed women of any place I've ever been. Don't send love letters, because she'll pretend she didn't read them. Don't send flowers because she'll pretend that they weren't a big deal. The goal of most German women is to ignore you as much as possible while trying to get on a pedestal for you to worship them. If you fall for it, you deserve the shit she'll put you through...

hey, im all for taking ANY opportunity to bash on the germans and majorly rib them...but with the women, i have been extremely lucky (i wouldnt really call it luck...maybe lucky in genetics or something)...i have found german women to be more down to earth, genuine, friendly and open more than anyone back in my home country...well, more so than not.

let's face it...german women are extraordinarily good looking...what's up with that? the guys dont look any different, almost uglier, than anywhere else...for the sex life: its heaven here!

I´d suggest you get out more.

I suggest he gets out more with robots.

???
I suggest YOU should...??

Although a generalisation : I've found much that 'spectre' says, rings true.
And many of my friends tend to agree.
Of course there are innumerable exceptions-thankfully.
But, it all reeks of damaged beings; both male & female.
Damaged society=damaged people.
Not that The Germans have a monopoly on that.

Well then please shed some light on that for me:
What´s so friggin damaged about the German society?

Huh? you must have met different ones that I did.

Huge generalisation here but they generally love...love letters, mainly because that whole thing is not as "expected" like opening doors etc...nothing wrong with worshipping one either...if shes worth it

ddesigns,

All women are different, whether they are German, American, Chinese, etc. Some may want you to screw their brains out on the first date, while others put you through an enduring obstacle course. You have to prove your worthiness. Try listening and paying more attention to her needs and interests, not just her physical traits. If you are really interested in this women, take your time and get to know her more. If not, be straightforward with her and tell her exactly how you feel. On the other hand, there are many single women in Germany. If sex is all that you want, why not try your luck with other women?

Nowegian student...
I've yet to find a society that isn't damaged in some way or another.
Perhaps by the very artificiality of the notion of nationhood.
And as far as the damage 'The Germans' have had...
Surely I don't need to elaborate on that.

Is there really, REALLY no subject at all about Germans and Germany that doesn't come back to the Third Reich? *Sigh*

If you're going to invent vague assertions about "damaged" German identity, do try to come up with something relevant to a young couple in 2008, TM.

cinzia...it was not my intention to bring it back to the third reich.
Perhaps, you assumed that.
The damage I refer to applies to every nation.
For me, Germany is not so much more damaged; or I should not be here.
But, (national) identity is full of shit, obviously.
And affects your every move.

omg stop the nonsense... you sound like a haiku

As long as you don't give an example, i assume you talk out of your arse.
If you have the sightest clue about modern German history and socio-cultural consequences
you'd know that this generation is probably most affected by the parental "68er" (era 1968-77 which ended in the German autumn). Smartarse ww2 refferences are pointless.

So... elaborate!

50's, late 60's and now. 3 completely different settings. If you want to go socio-political,
elaborate that. WW2 my arse.

Thanks toko and good onya.

It amazes me. Every time when it's about Germany and Germans, all what matters and comes down to in the end are those 12 years in the past you get judged on.
More than thousend years of rich history - just worthless.

What counts are the 12.

Not my intention to bring it back to the war.
Some people have chosen to assume that.
I saw plenty of confusion in society & relationships back in The UK.
War is only one influence amongst many.

As a german I do have to say that we all are different and like different things. Personally I do have to say that someone that does not like to show affection in public would be out of the question for me.

The German dating process is inscutible to an outsider. Suffice to say that things move very slowly as well as through an arcane series of stages that no you ask will be able to define, much like their educational system.

In fairness: It amazes me. Every time when it's about America and Americans, all what matters and comes down to in the end are those 8 years in the past you get judged on.
More than 388 years of rich history - just worthless.
What counts are the 8.

Or was that the other 8?

Apropos the thread ... german women are very nice. I married one. Our courtship behavior was identical to anything I ever saw in the US. Girls keep score by tallying up hundreds of little things that men forget c. five seconds after they do them (opening doors, little surprises, unexpected hugs and pecks on the lips, loading the dishwasher, etc.). Men just need profuse thanks for doing a handful occasional things like moving huge rocks in the garden and occassional budget-busting nice dinners out.

A colleague today told me that east german girls are easy compared to west german girls because their socialist upbringing wrung any semblance of propriety out of them. That should set off a brushfire or too. Discuss.

As a Californian married to a German man, yes, I will agree with this. LOL very very SLOOOOW. But that was kind of refreshing.