Legalities of co-habitation in a rented apartment

As some of you may know I have recently entered into a fairly serious relationship t:) We have decided after much discussion that we would quite like to live together and as he lives in a small basement in a town outside Munich and I have a gorgeous flat in central Munich, our preference would be for him to move here rather than me moving there.

Now, I moved in to this flat at the start of May and while it is lovely the landlord is a little inflexible on a few things. The contract I signed stipulates that it is for sole occupancy and explicitly bars subletting. At the time I clarified this with the Markler and basically the clause is there because the previous resident went on holiday during the Wiesn' and sublet the place to 20 odd Italians who trashed it and were very noisy. I suppose this is fair enough but I asked how it would affect me if I wanted my partner to move in. The Markler explicitly said that this clause would NOT stop me having my partner live here. However, I only got that verbally and not in writing.

Thing is though, I want to be absolutely sure what my rights are before I approach my landlord. I want to do everything above board but as I am gay and my partner is a man, I am aware how prejudice could be used against us particularly where we are unsure of what our rights actually are. I have no indication that my landlord would try to do this but I just want to be prepared in case. Would appreciate any guidance from anyone with experience or knowledge in this area.

A contract can ban sub-letting, but you aren't doing that.
I don't think that a clause in the contract specifying sole occupancy has any legal standing as long as the flat is of a decent size.

If you really want 100% spot on advice, ask the Mieterverein.

PS When can I come round and play trains with your boyf?

well if all goes to plan I hope he will officially move in in September

Just in time for the Wies'n.

Second the Mietverein suggestion.

My rental contract says that if the personal circumstances change, to inform them, I suppose from the residency point of view, as your new partner will also have to register for his new address. But subletting it clearly aint.

Its also a bit of a challenge to inform the landlord without using German gender-specific words.

Talk about stating the obvious.


Excuse me while I go surf hetero porn to remove the mental images.

I don't intend to try to hide the gender. In my experience that just compounds problems further down the line. Quite apart from anything else, he has been effectively living here but has not moved in is stuff for the last months or so and will have been seen here by the landlord who lives in the ground floor flat.

Ok, fair enough. I was thinking more that its not the landlords business to know the gender, but if they live in the same building, yes they'll probably have sussed that one out anyway...

ahem, MT's request was completely above board - both MT and the boyf a train enthusiasts and the boyf has a whole bunch of model trains.

me? I think it is a charming eccentricity for the timebeing

I know little/nothing about the official legalities of the situation but just running things logically through my head and it kinda goes like this:

You approach the landlord and explain simply and clearly exactly what you would like to do. Logically it then goes one of two ways:

1. Landlord says, yes, of course, no problem, thanks for telling him etc etc.

or

2. Landlord spits dummie out and starts quoting legal stuff from the contract about how you can't do this and that.

If it is the former response then all is well and dandy.

If it is the 2nd response, totally regardless as to whether he is TECHNICALLY on the correct legal footing as per contract etc etc - you can just forget it 'cos
there is no way you are gonna want to fight this legally, or live somewhere with a landlord that hates you and wants you out (even if you were to win the legal).

So depending on the response you then have the option of:

1. Staying but without the boyfriend.

2. Leaving and finding a new flat that is suitable and above board for co-habitation.

So for me, in this real world situation, I would not be interested in the true legalities as you are never gonna fight them anyway.

Just ask a fair question and if the landlord is a cock, not much you can do about that, either legally or otherwise.

As far as I am aware, your partner is permitted to move in regardless of what the contract states. The only potential snag I can see is getting your partner recognised as such. In theory the landlord can only refuse if the flat is too small for two people.

Edit: Found this to support my suspicions - not legal advice - but a discussion on the subject

http://www.gutefrage.net/frage/darf-ein-le...rmieter-davon-w

hhmmmm, the flat is 97 m2 so don't think it is too small

@koala - thanks for the link, very useful

Here is what I found on the Mieterbund e.V. website: "Besuch". Up to six weeks, your guests can stay without it being any of your landlord's business, if it is longer, you should inform him and ask for permission.


The number of flat occupants can be relevant for the utilities (Nebenkosten) bill, as some components can be calculated by number of persons (instead of flat squaremeters).

IMO you are dependent on the goodwill of the landlord. If you wanted to move in with your partner and the landlord had turned this down before entering into a contract, there would be a conflict between his freedom of contract (Vertragsfreiheit) and possible discrimination. But in your case, the contract was signed first and you accepted the terms (i.e. only one occupant). I would just talk to the landlord now; perhaps he would actually be happy to have two tenants (more financial security for him).

The Markler specifically asked if I had a partner so, to hedge my bets, I said yes but they would not be moving in with me. I then asked if it would be a problem later on if my partner moved in and the Markler said no. I wish I had got that in writing now though.

If there's a chance that the landlord has already worked out what your gender is, and if he's still letting you live in the flat, and if he's already seen your boyfriend coming and going, I don't think you should worry too much about him standing in your way. I agree with Johnny English: if the worst comes to the worst and he really doesn't want you there, he'll no doubt find some excuse for needing the flat, but he's hardly likely to chuck you out simply for asking whether another man can stay there. Whatever a landlord's prejudices, I think they'd have to be pretty extreme for him to get rid of a good tenant, especially if he has experienced bad tenants in the past.

"Makler reden viel, wenn der Tag lang ist." I think what matters is not what some Makler said but what is in the contract. Agree with Lorelei, you don't risk anything by asking the landlord (in fact it is the correct thing to do), but there is IMO (no legal advice) also no right you can claim for your partner to move in without the landlord's permission.

well we got a lovely letter back from my Landlord last night. She says there is no need to change the contract and that the Nebenkosten will stay the same. We should change the shields ourselves though she sent us the specifications. And then finally she gave us hearty congratulations. it was a lovely letter and the bbest possible outcome so peter can now officially move in!! Hooray