Could Merkel be Hitler's biological daughter? - Germany

Possibly the best conspiracy theory ever

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the_cat
Angela Merkel Is Hitler's Daughter?

Angela Merkel was born in the D.D.R., the Communist portion of Germany in 1954. Her biography says she was born on July 17, 1954, and that she is the daughter of a Lutheran minister from an East German-controlled church.

Recently, however, Soviet KJB archive files reveal an entirely different story.

Stasi GDR files indicate that she was born on April 20th, 1954, and details of her birth were included in the records of the German Dr. Karl Klauberg, who was one of the Nazi "death doctors" convicted by Soviet courts and imprisoned.

When he later was recognized as a brilliant scientist, he was released after seven years and was recognized as the father of artificial insemination. The Soviets were even more intrigued when they discovered Dr. Klauberg had preserved frozen samples of the sperm of Adolf Hitler.

The forces of darkness in high places decided to try to produce a child from Hitler's sperm, obviously for occult and illuministic purposes. Dr. Klauberg then brought the youngest sister of Eva Braun (Hitler's wife), whose name was Gretl, to Eastern Germany, and the result of the experiment produced not a biological son of Hitler, but rather a daughter.
Enjoy!

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James_Runner
Let's contextualize this nonsense a bit. Your citation comes from The Last Trumpet Newsletter, a cooky fundamentialist Protestant rag that thinks "Bible prophecy" predicts the end of the world in our generation. Connecting Merkel to an antichtist figure like Hitler is both profoundly stupid and offensive.
HelterSkelter
Is this text based on to the CIA factbook?
Super8
This bit is especially good!

The etymology of the name Hitler reveals that the name means a shepherd who lives in a hut.

The name Adolf from Old High German means noble wolf. Thus, his combined name indicates that he was the Shepherd Wolf, or false shepherd.

Strangely enough, Pope Ratzinger, or Benedict XVI, also has the title of Shepherd of the Church, and since he took office, the Roman Catholic Church has had a German shepherd.

Incidentally, that breed of dog resembles a wolf. We also know that Adolf Hitler nicknamed himself Herr Wolf. His East Prussian headquarters was called Wolfsschanze; his headquarters in France was called Wolfsschlucht, and his headquarters in the Ukraine was called Werwolf.

Will the powerful European Union become the New World Order and Fourth Reich? Only God knows.
the_cat
I just Googled it and took the first hit. You are quite correct to point out "The Last Trumpet" reference. Stupid perhaps? Offensive? Well, possibly if it were proved to be true.
the_cat
Is this text based on to the CIA factbook?
Judging by the picture it is more liked to be based on the CIA Facebook
William
Angela Merkel has an unusual obsession with the works of the occult composer Richard Wagner
Fuck it! For the sake of our immortal souls we need to exorcise Bayreuth now

My ribs are aching after reading that link
Tibia
and she bears a striking resemblance to him except for the little moustache, of course.
thanks for pointing that out, wierdo-website,whatever its name was.
cb6dba
Fuck, the world is about to end..Again!
gordonthemoron
Angela Merkel was born in Hamburg. Hitler died in 1945, sounds like a load of bollocks (of which hitler had only one)
cb6dba
Ahhhh, but did he realy die...

Was he not secretly spirted out of the germany earlier and went into hiding only ot later father ms merkel...

Oooooooo... conspiracy and villainy afoot...
Tibia
The article is suggesting that Hitler's sperm was doing a world tour, independent of its fuehrer. Bit like "The Boys From Brazil" really. Just take that plot and change it to Angela Merkel and there we are.
cb6dba
Oh my god..

The 'Hitler sperm tour'..

'Coming' to a city near you...
Thelonious Monk
Check out this picture from Suedduetsche Zeitung, a striking resemblance!

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Tibia
I was thinking more Charles and Diana, actually
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