Meeting friends in Berlin - difficult

18 posts in this topic

Posted

Hello everyone,

I moved here on Monday last week after recieving a job offer in a kindergarten. I love my new job it is amazing and what I studied for at uni however when I asked people from work to come out for drinks on Friday night they seemed to snub me off with an excuse. For me being from the UK and spending last year travelling new zealand, I am a very open and honest person who likes to socialise after work with fun people who I know I work with. I have been here a week and already thinking even though I love my job is it right for me here?!

I have been told by some german people that its not typical of germans to mix with work colleagues but they are all early 20's like myself and when you know nobody in this huge city you tend to think thats the first place to start. I am feeling very isolated as I know nobody and I am very outgoing and sociable at home so its a huge change for me... I tend to talk a lot and now i have nobody to talk to. I don't speak german but I am trying to pick it up quickly, but im sure most of you know this is hard.

I am just looking for tips from anyone who knows how I am feeling or maybe any ideas on how to meet friends etc? Or if anyone is in the same boat we could meet up and have a coffee\beer!!

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Posted

We have Young English Speakers meetups very regularly. You can join the facebook group where we organise things here: https://www.facebook.com/groups/207973825895375/ :)

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Posted

Hi Sophie,

I'm new to Berlin too, just moved here on saturday to start a job teaching english at a summer camp here. I'm currently a student in England, studying German and Arabic. I'm also finding it a bit difficult meet people here, especially since it's the first time i've lived away from home so i'm missing my family and friends quite a lot!

I'd be really happy to meet up with you if you wanted? I could even help you learn some German?

Hope things have improved for you!

Best wishes,

Hannah

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Posted

I would say that making friends is fairly difficult in general. I don't mean making acquaintances, but actual friends.

Personally I find that while I do have many acquaintances (I have also 'acquired' my girlfriend's friends) none of them are anywhere near friend level.

I must say that I do find the Germans and Russians I have met to be hard to connect with. For me it comes down to having a very different way of thinking. They are great people, but we just don't click.

It's become quite clear to me that I'm probably going to have to make friends with other Brits/Yanks/Assies/Canadians. It really does feel like a cop out and that I am falling into the cliched 'expat who wont interact with the locals', but I think it's probably better for me.

I had no problem making friends with Chinese (when I lived there), so I'm rather surprised that I can't do the same here.

Such is life.

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Posted

Hi Sophie,

I'm new to Berlin too, just moved here on saturday to start a job teaching english at a summer camp here. I'm currently a student in England, studying German and Arabic. I'm also finding it a bit difficult meet people here, especially since it's the first time i've lived away from home so i'm missing my family and friends quite a lot!

I'd be really happy to meet up with you if you wanted? I could even help you learn some German?

Hope things have improved for you!

Best wishes,

Hannah

I would of thought that after 2 nights you should have known half of the city by now.

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Posted

or click here

And look further through the Events and Meetups section of Toytown.

("Ah, yes, but it's Germans I want to meet")

There are Germans at language exchange meetups. In any case, expats who go to Toytown events often have German friends.

People know people who know other people (and so on)

Being an Old Fart, I've never felt excluded from events - even though nearly everyone is much younger than me.

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Posted

Hi,

I have the same "problem"! I am a Norwegian girl who moved to Berlin in September, to be with my boyfriend. I though it would be a fun challenge to meet new people, since it has gone well when I have lived in other countries. But then I studied and now I have graduated... I am freelancing for a Norwegian magazine, which means that I don't have any colleges here, nor any fellow-students. I fear that I am driving my boyfriend crazy, since we have been hanging out every day since September. Haha, poor guy.

Does anybody want to meet up? I am 25 y.o., very social (at least I used to be) and very keen on exploring Berlin. Send me a PM!

- Anne.

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Posted

Or completely ignore that advice and start your own thread. I suppose that's another way to go.

You going to them rather than expecting them to come to you is always a better approach.

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Posted

You could simply try attending one of the many Toytown meetups, Aanne.

And, for best results, leave your bf at home.

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Posted

Hi!

Sorry if it seemed rude to start a new post; I really didn't mean for that to happen. I just wanted to make sure that people would see the post, but since there is more activity in here - I will try to delete it! Thanks so much for the advice!

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Posted

What Keydeck means (which was also my intention) is that as a newcomer to Berlin and to Toytown, you will have a much easier time meeting people at one of the established meetups - of which many take place each week in various parts of town - than you will in trying to organize your own meetup. Thursday Night Drinks always attracts a crowd of at least 20, usually more.

Welcome to Toytown.

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Posted

Aha! Then I understand, thank you! (Good thing I didn't offend anyone by starting a new tread, because I can't figure out how to delete it :)). Will definitly check out the meetups and the Thursday Night Drinks! Thanks, again!

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Posted

you should come to the Junction Bar tonight for the Thursday Night Drinks group :)

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Posted

I have unfortunately found it really hard to make friends here, even after a year and a half. I would suggest you try meetup.com (type in Berlin) and join some of the many meetup groups in this town, which attract Germans and expats alike.

good luck

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Posted

Thanks for all the great advice!! 2013 is going to be a social year!!

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