Obscure brands - thinking of ZIL. Used to make the huge black limos used by Russian Presidents during the Cold War. Through the marvel of Soviet economic planning they also made live artillery shells as well as domestic refrigerators. Lends a whole new meaning to "cool".
(sorry about links, tried the media insert thing but can't get it to work)
I've a friend in MA in hospice care who has lived an interesting and well travelled life prior to this, living in Africa and Asia and Europe. She's apparently been reminiscing and I thought it would be nice for her to receive some fruit from the gardens that once upon a time she had helped to set up. Can anyone tell me the rules? Will US Customs or whatever allow a small personal care package with things like fresh mangoes and lychees and so forth? Grateful for any inputs.
Clarification: the fruit will not go from Europe, I will arrange for them to be couriered directly from the farm in Ceylon and hopefully also from the garden in Cameroon.
Five blokes in an Audi Quattro arrived at the ferry checkpoint .
Tracey, in her brand new uniform, stops them and tells them: "I can't let you on the ferry. It is illegal to have 5 people in a Quattro. Quattro means four. One of you will have to get out and stay behind."
"Quattro is just the name of the car," the driver replies disbelievingly. "Look at the papers: this car is designed to carry five persons."
"You cannot pull that one on me. This is Tracey you're talking to here," she replies with a smile. "Quattro means four. You have five people in your car and you are therefore breaking the law. So I can't let you onto the ferry. It's more than my job's worth to let you all on."
The driver is now very cross and replies angrily, "I've had enough of you. Call your supervisor over. I want to speak to someone with more intelligence!"
"Sorry," responds Tracey, "but Sharon is busy with those two blokes in the Fiat Uno."
I remember I was also surprised not to find big old B&Q style DIY shops. It all seems to be spread across a number of different stores and not in one place. Most of the time though I've learned to make do with B1 Discount and Praktiker. B1 is cheaper, perhaps more oriented towards supplies, Praktiker is more oriented towards tools and has slightly better stuff.
I don't know what are the UK quarantine laws nowadays? When I looked at doing this in the late '90s I found my dog would be held in quarantine kennels for 6 months. Apart from the expense (because they will bill you for it) I just couldn't bring myself to do that to him. Perhaps worth checking?
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A young banker screeches to a stop outside his office in his brand new Porsche, very keen to show it off to his colleagues. As he's getting out of the car, a lorry comes speeding along too close to the kerb and takes off the door before zooming off. More than a little distraught, the Banker grabs his mobile and calls the police.
Five minutes later, the police arrive. Before the policeman has a chance to ask any questions, the man starts screaming hysterically: 'My Porsche, my beautiful silver Porsche is ruined. No matter how long it's at the panel beaters it'll simply never be the same again!'
After the man finally finishes his rant, the policeman shakes his head in disgust.
'I can't believe how materialistic you bloody bankers are,' he says. 'You lot are so focused on your possessions that you don't notice anything else in your life.'
"How can you say such a thing at a time like this?" sobs the Porsche owner.
The policeman replies, 'Didn't you realise that your left arm was also torn off when the truck hit you.'
The Banker looks down in horror.
'F***ING H*LL!' he screams....'Where's my Rolex???'
Conversation over dinner:
WOMAN: What would you do if I died? Would you get married again?
MAN: Definitely not!
WOMAN: Why not - don't you like being married?
MAN: Of course I do.
WOMAN: Then why wouldn't you remarry?
MAN: Okay, I'd get married again.
WOMAN: You would? (with a hurtful look on her face)
MAN: (makes audible groan)
WOMAN: Would you sleep with her in our bed?
MAN: Where else would we sleep?
WOMAN: Would you put away my pictures, and replace them with pictures of her?
MAN: That would seem like the proper thing to do.
WOMAN: And would you let her use my golf clubs?
MAN: She can't use them; she's left-handed.